Hello everyone,
Last year, around this time, I was announcing my wedding.
This year, I’m pleased to announce that I am pregnant. We are expecting a little nugget in March 2026. I will document my pregnancy symptoms throughout, but today I am officially 14 weeks. In this article, I share with you my reluctance to have children, my decision-making process, and my conception story (without going into too many details 😂).
I was torn between having children. I am the only child, and I have always been the person who sits in the furthest corner from the children when we are at a party. My husband is the same. I never really felt this strong maternal instinct that people often speak about. I had this candid conversation with my husband before we got married and told him, I’m not sure if I want children’ I had so many fears about it: what if they die, what if I can’t pursue my dreams anymore, what if I will just become a mom, what if… what if…
However, over winter, I started addressing some of these thoughts. I promised my husband I would put in the work to confront these fears and only make a decision once I have done so. Fear is a weird feeling. I realised it is an insecurity, a lack of belief that you can deal with challenging experiences. Looking at these thoughts, I realised I am so capable of doing things. I have always figured things out. It will be hard (so they say, I will let you know), but I can do hard things.
Getting Toffee, our lovely dog, also changed things for me. Perhaps the maternal instinct kicked in (I'm still not sure what this is meant to feel like). First and foremost, it showed me that looking after someone is deeply fulfilling. The dread of having to look after a screaming child made me annoyed. You want me to let go of all my hobbies and activities, to look after a child who screams and poops? Well, turns out that is fulfilling AF. Even better than ticking things off your big to-do list or getting a promotion. His cute eyes light up my day. His cute paws sound on our floor make me so happy. I thought to myself: Can you imagine how happy a child’s laugh will make you? How happy will his/her eyes staring at you make you feel? Don’t get me wrong, I still get annoyed with Toffee all the time when he is naughty, but those feelings last a little compared to what he brings for the rest of the time.
After six months of contemplation, I decided I am ready to give it a try. I started preparing in January/February: no alcohol, Metformin (a potential decrease in miscarriage risk), better nutrition. I also started prepping my husband - he is still upset about the lack of wine.
We officially tried in May. If you have watched my Ovulation tracking, May was an irregular 44-day cycle. Perfect! We then also tried in June, and I became pregnant. I honestly thought it would take a year. You hear so much that we struggle, and having been deep in the data for our fertility series, I was convinced I would struggle to get pregnant and/or would lose my first one. I think I got lucky. I really don’t want to put it down to the preparation because you never know what type of difference that made. I will encourage everyone to prep, but also be cautious and stay realistic.
And here we are! Expecting our first. I don’t know the gender yet, but I will be sure to let you know. What do you think it is?
I will try not to overwhelm everyone with pregnancy content as I understand not everyone is at this stage yet. However, I will provide a monthly update on my symptoms and the progress of my condition. You guys are my family, and this is my little safe corner of the internet.
See you next Sunday,
Francesca
Congratulations!! I am so very excited for you!🧡
Congrats!!! 🎉