Brenna’s story: living and learning with PCOS #122

"I’ll take care of her!"

Hello everyone,

Today we have an incredible story from a fellow writer

Brenna

who authors a beautiful blog about moving to Italy, taking a career break and life. Her writing will make you feel like you are reading your favourite book on a Sunday with a cup of coffee.

She also happens to have PCOS, as many women do. Here is her story and the most powerful sentence I took from it:

“It has been a long journey. I wish I could go back and give my little frightened 11-year-old girl self a hug and tell her not to worry - that I’ll take care of her! “

I feel exactly the same! Over to

Brenna

:

I was 11 years old when I got my period. Early puberty was uncomfortable: I grew too tall to fit into the clothes that fit my friends. I wore khakis and turtlenecks at school dances instead of tube tops and jean skirts. At my 6th-grade dance recital, I was at least a head taller than all of the boys, so they stared directly at my boobs.

Having my period was a secret I kept from my inquiring friends - I didn’t want to be perceived as different or weird.

Eventually, we learned about the menstrual cycle at my public school in Pennsylvania, USA. The boys and girls went into separate rooms, snickering and giggling to cover our nervousness. We watched a video and they gave us big, giant menstrual pads in square cardboard boxes. I kept mine in the front zipper of my Jansport backpack in case of emergency. I was too young to use a tampon. One day after school, one of my guy friends was being playful and he opened up the zipper at the bottom of my backpack. He picked up the giant pad, held it between his fingers, and said, “ewww”. All of the other kids were laughing as my face turned crimson-hot in embarrassment. My secret was out.

When I went to college at 18, my period stopped altogether and I got bad acne on my jawline. I worked with my mom to see several doctors and specialists, many of whom said I “exercised too much” or that “going to college can cause disturbance in your cycle”. Eventually, a dermatologist sent me to an endocrinologist who diagnosed me with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I knew little about the disease, and the only thing my doctor said was that it “might be difficult for me to get pregnant”. These words haunted me and stay with me still today.

No 20-year-old should have to live in fear for her own health.

I was prescribed birth control without explanation of the ramifications, and I was not provided the reassurance I needed to be proactive with my health.

I didn’t know two things:

1. it would take years of self-study through reading to improve my health literacy

2. speaking with other women through shared oral histories would become a more trusted source than a medical professional.

When I turned 30 and started thinking more seriously about my fertility, I went for a proactive check-up with my GYN and found out I also have hypothyroidism. When my period did not return after stopping birth control, I took matters into my own hands.

I read everything I could about PCOS. I signed up for Natural Cycles as birth control while I attempted to balance my hormones. I started taking Ovasitol and other supplements. I stopped running and HIIT workouts and focused on low-impact exercises to regulate my cycles.

To control my insulin resistance, I cut alcohol, caffeine, sugar, gluten, and dairy. That proved to be way too restrictive and also had no effect on my cycle.

I tried different things for a few years, and now quit alcohol and caffeine but otherwise follow a Mediterranean diet full of complex carbohydrates like beans and other low-glycemic foods. Especially because I was always thin, doctors waved away any further investigation into my cardiovascular or endocrine system.

All of the knowledge I gained was not from doctors, but rather through naturopaths, dieticians, midwives, and other clinicians focused on whole-body well-being.

Six years later, my cycle is around 35 days but I still have some off months. I still take Synthroid for my thyroid, and when I recently felt ready to conceive I had some difficulties.

It has been a long journey.

I wish I could go back and give my little frightened 11-year-old girl self a hug and tell her not to worry - that I’ll take care of her!

I’m not sure how much has improved since that day in 5th grade when we got a box of maxi pads instead of any actual education about the power of period health for well-being. Despite being a vital sign for half of the population, there is still a lack of funding, research, and treatment for people with PCOS and other gynecological conditions.

My wish for future generations is to feel empowered with knowledge about how to find a lifestyle that works for their wellness. Most of all, I wish people of all genders were educated on menstrual health, to not only raise awareness but also dispel any shame for the 1 in 10 women who suffer from the disease.

Brenna

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